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Thursday, December 12, 2019

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Please give me some feedback, thank you! :)


The bar chart compares export earnings in five different categories in one country from 2015 to 2016, and the table gives information on the proportion change in each exported product over one year.

It is clear that the country made the most profit in exporting petroleum products in both years. Also, only the earning from exported gems and jewelry saw a decrease by one year.

In 2015, the profit from exported Petroleum products stood at about 60 billions, which was followed by a 3% upward trend to nearly 63 billions in 2016. Similarly, export earning in engineered goods experienced a rise roughly from 55 billions to 62 billions over a one-year period. The biggest growth was seen in the exporting values of textiles with a 15.24% change.

There was only one drop tendency of export earning in gems and jewelry, the figure was approximately 43 billions in 2015, reducing about 3 billions with a 5.18% change by one year. In terms of agricultural goods, the exporting earning stayed quite constant in two separate years at around 31 billions.

Hi Simon,
In your overview you have written "earning exports". Shouldn't it be "export earnings" instead?

Hi Milan,

No, I wrote “highest earning exports” on purpose. Can you (or anyone else) figure out why?

In some countries, governments are encouraging industries and businesses to move to regional areas outside the big cities. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

In some parts of the world, companies and commercial sectors are encouraged by state authorities to be shifted to the outskirts of metropolises. In my opinion, the minor drawbacks of losing valuable clients and employees associated with this development are outweighed by the two primary benefits.

Relocating firms or businesses outside of large urban areas is disadvantageous due to the loss of valuable customers. Problems related to certain basic facilities, such as airport, food, and clean water, are evident in rural areas. No clients, in particular, international ones, like to face these issues while working with the companies located in poorly developed places. Besides, such companies would lose many talented employees as perhaps these people are habituated to the hustle and bustle of the city life or addicted to some amusement facilities, such as sports clubs, multiplex cinemas, and bars, therefore, they could not even imagine life without these amenities. To me, these negatives are less than important as it is possible for companies to tackle such issues by using management tactics.

On the other hand, a reduction in environmental pollution is the major benefit of this government’s initiative. As more people will move to small towns or villages for their jobs or in search of employment, the level of air pollution due to vehicles, factories, and overpopulation will drop drastically. At the same time, underdeveloped or undeveloped areas will be benefited from rapid development. Due to the rise in the number of companies and working people, many businessmen prefer to focus on constructing many basic facilities, such as roads, schools, and hospitals, in such areas to make high profits. This will improve the overall lifestyle of the local inhabitants. I believe this is a win-win situation for everyone as citizens could notice health improvement due to less polluted air and villagers could enjoy better facilities in terms of education, medical treatment, and others.

To conclude, despite the above-mentioned disadvantages, I argue that the advantages of the enhancement of city dwellers’ health and the swift growth of rural areas because of having more factories and businesses than before are more significant.

Haoheng

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/trend#Noun

Notice that a trend refers to an average rise or fall over a minimum of three data points. If we are comparing just two data points then words like "rise", "increase", "fall", "decline" are more appropriate. We could, however, talk about "an upward trend" in export earnings overall, as we are then referring to the average of more than two categories.

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/tendency

The word "tendency" usually refers to behavior, be it of people, animals, or an object in motion. It would not normally be appropriate in Task 1 unless the statistics refer to some kind of behavioral study.

The requirement is to "present a clear overview of main trends, differences or stages". The overall trend for the five categories is upward. Your second paragraph does not refer to any overall trend, but merely picks out the highest and lowest, which of itself does not meet the requirement.

Haoheng

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/trend#Noun

Notice that a trend refers to an average rise or fall over a minimum of three data points. If we are comparing just two data points then words like "rise", "increase", "fall", "decline" are more appropriate. We could, however, talk about "an upward trend" in export earnings overall, as we are then referring to the average of more than two categories.

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/tendency

The word "tendency" usually refers to behavior, be it of people, animals, or an object in motion. It would not normally be appropriate in Task 1 unless the statistics refer to some kind of behavioral study.

The requirement is to "present a clear overview of main trends, differences or stages". The overall trend for the five categories is upward. Your second paragraph does not refer to any overall trend, but merely picks out the highest and lowest, which of itself does not meet the requirement.

Haoheng

"on the proportion change"-> on the proportional change

Some categories include more than one product so " in each exported product" is misleading: more accurately something like "the table details the exact percentage rises and falls between the two years in question".

"Profit" is income less expenses, costs, write-offs, amortizations, taxation, and any losses or gains on disposal of capital items. "Earnings" may or may not be gross or net. In the case in point, it is more likely refers to the gross income stream. [And most famously, "income is what comes in": cf Californian Copper Syndicate Ltd. vs. Harris; also Lowe J in Re Income Tax Acts (No 2) [1930] VLR 211 at 233]

Hi Simon,
You said that you wrote "earning exports" on purpose, but I can't figure out why. Plus, on top of the chart it is written "export earnings", so is the wording in the question wrong? Can you please explain that? Thank you for your help.

Hi Simon,
I have a question about the word "outlier"? I think I know the meaning but I'm not sure how to use it. Can we say that the textile industry was the outlier in the table? Thank you so much for your help.

Milan

i'm not that knowledgeable about English grammar, but i think 'highest earning exports' is similar to 'highest grossing films' or 'beautifully drawn houses'. I think 'highest earning' functions as an adjective.

In this particular context, i think the words 'highest-earning', 'main' and 'principal' are more or less synonymous and can be used interchangeably. For example, 'petroleum products were the highest earning exports in both years' would mean the same thing as 'petroleum products were the main exports in both years'.

Hi,
# Wanda, reading your comments dis open my eyes. thanks a lot!
# Milan, it was a silly mistake by Simon when "export earnings" became "earning exports". In this context, " Petroleum products were the highest earning exports", experts here refers to "a product that is sold to another country" (Oxford dictionary). Petroleum products are plural, so it is "exports". "the highest earning exports" is similar to " these are the best/ most expensive dancing shoes I 've bought".
Just what I think.

Sorry, mistyped. I mean "it was NOT a simply mistake Simon made".

FROM SIMON:

Yes, just to confirm: "the highest earning exports" is correct, and I wrote it on purpose. It means "the exports that earned the most".

highest earning = earned the most money

As shokhrukh said, it's similar to the phrase "the highest grossing film" (the film that made the most money).

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