IELTS Grammar: conclusion mistakes

The following sentences come from conclusions that people shared below this lesson. Can you improve them by correcting mistakes or by choosing more natural phrasing?

1. Organising a same parenting course for mothers and fathers with different family, culture and education background is impractical.
2. I do not see it as applicable to force parents to attend special courses.
3. That is a hard journey with fully challenges.
4. I disagree with the need for parents attending a mandatory parenting course.
5. I disagree with the view that parents should be made to undertake a parenting course instead these factors should rather be taken into consideration.

Comments

[茶亦人生]

1.Organising a same parenting course for mothers and fathers from different family, culture and education background is impractical.
2.I do not see it as a applicable task to force parents to attend special courses.
3.That is a hard journey with full of challenges.
4.I disagree with the need that parents attend a mandatory parenting course.
5.I disagree with the view that parents should be made to undertake a parenting course instead of these factors being taken into consideration.

[M. Dadashipour]

1'. Organizing the same parenting course is impractical for mothers and fathers from different family, culture and educational background.

2'. It does not seem an applicable task to force parents attending the special course.

3'. That is a difficult journey full of challenges.

4'. I disagree with the need of parents attend a mandatory parenting course.

5'. I disagree with the view that parents should take a parenting course instead of these factors being taken into consideration.

[Lilin]

1. Organising a same parenting course to mothers and fathers who are from different family, cultural and educational backgrounds is impractical.
2. I do not see the special courses are applicable to force parents to attend them.
3. That is a hard and challenging journey.
4. I disagree with the need of parents attending a mandatory parenting course.
5. I disagree with the view that parents should take a parenting course, instead of focusing on factors that help improve parenting skills.

[Ngoc Ninh]

1. Organising a same parenting course for mothers and fathers from different family, cultural and educational background is impractical.

2. It is not applicable to force parents to attend special courses.

3. It is a hard journey with many challenges.

4. I disagree with the need of parents attending mandatory parenting courses.

5. I disagree with the idea of parents attending mandatory parenting courses.

[Tae]

1, Organising the same parenting course is impractical for a different family, culture and education background.

2, I would argue that it is not appropriate to force all parents to attend the specialised courses.

3 That would be challenging.

4, I disagree with the idea of parents to attend a mandatory parenting course.

5, I disagree with the view that parents should undertake a parenting course instead of considering these factors.

[josephina]

hi simon,

In conclusion ,child rearing is a liability which needs big effort and sacrifice even so,I am totally against the fact of compelling all mothers and fathers to sit in on parenting course .

[Duyenvietnam]

1.Organizing the same parenting course for mothers and fathers in different family, culture and education background is impractical
2.It seems not to be applicable to force parents to attend special courses
3.It is a hard journey full of challenges
4.It is not necessary for parents to attend a mandatory parenting course
5.I disagree with the view that parents should undertake parenting courses instead of these factors which should rather be taken into consideration

[liu min yu]

1 To organize a same course for parents attending regardless of a different family, culture and education background is impractical.
It is impractical to organize a same course for parents attending regarding their different family, culture, and educational background.

[liu min yu]

2. It is an application task to force parents for attending special courses.
3. It is a long journey full of a challenge.
4. I disagree with the idea of parents to attend a mandatory parenting course.

It is unnecessary for parents to attend a mandatory parenting course
5.I disagree with the view that parents should be required undertake a parenting course instead these factors being taken into consideration.

[Hien Tran]

1. Organising a same parenting course for mothers and fathers with different family, culture and education background is impractical.
=> It is impractical to organize the same course for parents from different cultural and educational backgrounds.

2. I do not see it as applicable to force parents to attend special courses.
=> It seems to me that forcing parents to attend a special course is inapplicable.

3. That is a hard journey with fully challenges.
=> Such a journey is undoubtedly challenging.

4. I disagree with the need for parents attending a mandatory parenting course.
=> I disagree with the idea that every parent needs a mandatory training.

5, I disagree with the view that parents should be made to undertake a parenting course instead these factors should rather be taken into consideration.
=> I disagree with the view that parents should be made to undertake a training course, although these factors should still be taken into consideration.

[Hien Tran]

1. Organising a same parenting course for mothers and fathers with different family, culture and education background is impractical.
=> It is impractical to organize the same course for parents from different cultural and educational backgrounds.

2. I do not see it as applicable to force parents to attend special courses.
=> It seems to me that forcing parents to attend a special course is inapplicable.

3. That is a hard journey with fully challenges.
=> Such a journey is undoubtedly challenging.

4. I disagree with the need for parents attending a mandatory parenting course.
=> I disagree with the idea that every parent needs a mandatory training.

5, I disagree with the view that parents should be made to undertake a parenting course instead these factors should rather be taken into consideration.
=> I disagree with the view that parents should be made to undertake a training course, although these factors should still be taken into consideration.

[Yen]

1.It is impractical that organizing the same parenting courses for mothers and fathers from different background of culture and education.
2.It does not be seen as applicable to force parents to attend special courses.
3.That would be a hard journey with lots of challenges.
4.I disagree with the concept of that attending mandatory parenting courses is necessary to parents.
5.I disagree with the view that parents should undertake parenting courses instead of these factors which should be taken into consideration.

[Sophie]

Let me have a try:
1.It’s imp.ractical to organize the same course for all the parents with different cultural and educational backgrounds.
2.I don’t see it as an applicable way to force parents to attend special courses.
3.That is a hard journey with full of challenges.
4.I disagree that parents need to attend a mandatory parenting course.
5.I disagree with the view that parents should be made to undertake a parenting course rather than these factors are taken into consideration.

[Abby]

1. Organising the same parenting course for families with the different culture and educational background is impractical.
2. In my opinion, it is inapplicable to force parents to attend special courses.
3. That is a journey full of challenges.
4. I think it is unnecessary for parents to attend a mandatory parenting course.
5. I disagree with the view that parents should undertake a parenting course without taking these factors into consideration.

[Oley]

1. Organizing a parenting course for mothers and fathers who come from different families,cultures and education backgrounds is impractical.

2. It is not an applicable way to force parents to attend special courses.

3.That is a hard journey but full of challenges.

4.I disagree that attending a parenting course is mandatory for parents.

5. I disagree with the view that parents should take a parenting course as their responsibilities instead it should be something of their choice.

[Nancy]

1, It is impractical to organize a parenting course for mothers and fathers who come from different families, cultures and education backgrounds.
2, I do not see it is applicable to force parents to attend special courses
3, That is a journey full of challenges.
4, I don't think it's necessary for parents to attend a mandatory parenting course.
5, I disagree with the view that parents should undertake a parenting course, but I agree that parents should take this factors into consideration.

[liz]

1.It is impractical to enforce a parenting course on mothers and fathers from different family, culture and education background.
2.I do not see it is applicable to parents to attend special courses.
3.That is a difficult journey and full of challenges.
4.I disagree with the idea that it is required for parents attending a mandatory parenting course.
5.I believe that parents should not be made to undertake a compulsory parenting course, but rather take these factors into consideration.

[Simon]

ANSWERS FROM SIMON:

First here are the main problems in each sentence:

1. We can't say "a same course". Also, "background" needs to be plural.

2. "Applicable" is the wrong choice of word.

3. We can't say "fully challenges" unless "challenges" is used as a verb - it is used as a plural noun here.

4. The 'ing' form "attending" should be replaced by "to attend".

5. The main problem is the use of "instead". This would be better at the start of a new sentence. I would also change the word "undertake".

[Simon]

FROM SIMON (continued)

Here are my suggested versions:

1. It would not be practical to run a parenting course for mothers and fathers who have such different family, cultural and educational backgrounds.

2. I do not believe that it is possible to force parents to attend special courses.

3. It is a difficult and hugely challenging journey.

4. I disagree with the idea that parents should attend a mandatory parenting course.

5. I disagree with the view that parents should be made to take a parenting course. Instead, they should be offered support if and when they need it.

[Miyako]

1. Organising a same parenting course for mothers and fathers with different family, culture and education background is impractical.

--> It is impractical to organise similar parenting course for mothers and fathers, who are coming from different family, cultural and educational background,

2. I do not see it as applicable to force parents to attend special courses.

--> I do not think that is possible to force parents to attend parenting course.

3. That is a hard journey with fully challenges.

--> The whole journey might be full of challenges.

4. I disagree with the need for parents attending a mandatory parenting course.

--> I disagree with the necessity of requiring parents to attend the mandatory parenting course.

5. I disagree with the view that parents should be made to undertake a parenting course instead these factors should rather be taken into consideration.

--> I disagree with the view that parents must attend a parenting course. Rather, these factors should be taken into account.