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Wednesday, April 13, 2016

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How is good this introduction?

While the main aim of corporations is to make profits, they also should have an altruistic side. An organization that gives in charity would earn the goodwill of the public more easily and build a better brand than one that simply aims to make more money.

For this topic my introduction is;

Businesses are not only make a money but also develop and include social responsibilities for community. I Completely agree that suggestion because businesses have been reached to crucial area within other measurements.

When I did online research, I also noticed this keyword "corporate social responsibility". Here are some useful links:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Corporate_social_responsibility
http://www.ehow.com/list_7594756_arguments-against-corporate-social-responsibility.html
http://www.ehow.com/info_7757292_benefits-corporate-social-responsibility-company.html
http://www.ehow.com/list_7571152_importance-corporate-social-responsibility.html

Hi, please leave your comments about my introduction and planning. Thanks

It is true that making money is the main aim of businesses, but they also have several social responsibilities. I completely agree with this view.

P2) financial role of businesses,
P3) social role of businesses,

In conclusion, i believe that businesses have social and economical role.

I think, my introduction and conclusion are too short and brief. I am not sure whether it is fine.

Corporate social responsibility (CSR) isn't just important for people and the planet, but also is vital for business success.

A company's CSR strategy is a big factor in where today's top talent chooses to work.

And my introduction:

It is often argued that companies should pursue profits as well as their social responsibilities. I completely agree with this kind of idea because corporate social responsibility is the essential factor for all companies to be successful.

It is true that Companies main aim should make profits but their approach should also satisfy the social expectations. I completely agree that Businesses should think about stakeholder's social. ethical and environmental expectations.

Body (before)
The business is business, the trader set his heart on privileges since owner started the business, regards the capitalism .Moreover, until this industry development well lastingly brings the fortune, at the same time the boss might be consider some part of enterprise culture , such as reputation , company ship , and local citizenship .If they didn’t pay attentions on how to develop local community and social responsibility, perhaps lose the respect, feedback, and reliable on their products line. Even cannot survive well in present time and competitive others due to globalism

There are some reasons to explain why it is necessary for industry take a responsible on whole society In order to reduce the taxing .Firstly raise the enterprise image,
likely the fast food industry doing some kinds of activity frequency, such as supporting the orphan’s education, take care of the homeless, and the older citizen. And secondly to engage with creative big bonus that set up organization partake event for kids or young people that is sponsorship in order to expose the brand image on Ads board for a while.For instance ran the campaign as the drawing or cycling .Thirdly, the balance incomes as well as sustainable. For example the local hospital is corporate with pharmaceutical manufactory, meanwhile, to debate on environment issue because of prevent disease spread, raise people on a medical treatment.

intro / plan (after)


It is true that in additions the business making money need to having social responsiveness. Therefore I completely agree with this idea
2nd Entrepreneurship related to the local citizenship
Such as sustainable development / mapping territory
3rd
the social responsibilities
in which are sponsorship between enterprises and community

Hi simon. I have a trouble in this question. Can u please help me.
One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectency is increasing. Do you think the adventages of this development outweight the disadvantages?
Can you please expain that its a opinion question or discussion question...l have my exam on 16 APRIL...

In conclusion, I believe that for sustainable development and proliferation it is worth to duty in society

Meet.....

http://ielts-simon.com/ielts-help-and-english-pr/2012/08/ielts-writing-task-2-advantages-and-disadvantages.html

I hope you find it useful....good luck

Hi Simon, Could write or give some tips about successfulness as well, because it seems to be quite abstract topic. Recent ielts question "Some people believe that the best way to be successful in life it is needed to take a university degree.Others think that nowadays it is no longer true. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.(a little bit paraphrased)

While the first sight to business is making money ,but if we look around we will get that those who accept responsibility against their society are more successful.I am completely agree that successful business should consider moral .

Thanks N.S. Now i got what to write in this. Thanks

Do you think that if we discuss about both views of topic it has more score?or
We Can only right about only one opinion?
Thank you very much for your advices it is very useful

hi simon
I heard from many ielts teacher that should mention your theses in the introduction is it wright?

Meet...

You are welcome....Thanks to Simon..

HELLO HELLO HELLO Guys I am looking for Speaking Partner We will talk about IELTS questions and our Conversation will be via IMO MY IMO NUMBER IS +998932566949
Beat Regards
Akramshakh

my thoughts of starting the body part:
Indeed, making money is the ultimate goal of the business. But selling a good product or service is no longer enough to attract today's socially conscious consumers, because they have too many choices. Undertaking social responsibility will help the business stand out from competitors.

Task 2: (21/4/16)
Nowadays, more and more older people who need employment have to compete with younger people to work for the same job.
What problems this can cause?
And what solutions?

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