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Wednesday, November 03, 2010

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Hi,simon
these are my ideas;
1;encourge residents in rural areas to continue living there by improving the infrastructure ,sanitation,and transportation in that places.
2,provide differet kinds of jobs in these areas to prevent moving to cities for seeking work.
3,more plans to organise the cities lives.
kind regards

Good ideas. Thanks Ahmed.

hi simon
my introduction paragraph is:

During the last century more and mor people migrated from rural areas to cities searching for a better life.As aconsequence, alot of troubles emarged,and put the governments in a big chalenge to solve it.

THE CONCOLUSION PARAGRAPH IS

To sum up, migration of people from rural areas to cities creat alot of problems which have anigative impact on this cities.
Governements in combination with experts should fined a suitable solutions not only to improve the live of people in urban areas but also to peoples`life in rural areas to prevent thier migration.
please send your coment
thanks

hi simon
my idias are:
1-good planning of the streats to prevent traffic cogestion
2-all people in the cities should have a suitable wages that can cover their needs
3-people shoud be encouraged to migrate to less crowded places

In my country , lots of people move to cities to seek for better health care and educational resource for their offsprings , not only for the money, people are thinking for longer term, so the government should have a far-sighted plan to eliminate the gap between urban areas and suburb areas.

Hi m hatab,

Your ideas are really good. Just check your spelling carefully - you make quite a lot of small spelling mistakes.

...

Hi Johnny,

Good ideas, but maybe you could separate them into 2 sentences rather than one big sentence.

Good work!

Simon

Hi simon
my introduction would be .
people are migrating towards cities by leaps and bounds which ,in turn,can result in overcrowding,pollution ,traffic congestion and even committing atrocities as a result.

A piece of body part would be like this.
People are suffering from too much migration .This can be solved easily if some measures are taken into consideration;As an illustration ,providing facilities and amenities like cities at rural area would draw their attention to their own area.Thanks to new technology ,the number of people who work from home are increasing considerably;thus,rural area are the same as city in term of job opportunities.

Hi Soodabeh,

Your ideas are good, but I don't recommend writing "by leaps and bounds" in an academic essay - it's not the right style. Also, I wouldn't say that people "suffer" from migration, but you could say that "migration can cause several problems for people and communities".

Hope this helps

Hi Simon
Thank you .Your sugestions are very helpful for me.

Hi Simon
Thank you .Your sugestions are very helpful for me.

No problem Soodabeh.

Can I just list two or three negative impacts posed by the urbanization? Because in the real teat, I am afraid I will not have enough time to list all my opinions. If that,maybe I can not get the higher score?

Hi Eric,

Two or three negatives would be fine. You just need to develop each idea so that you reach 250 words.

Hi Simon,

I would plan my writing as following:

1/introduction:
it is true that the population is moving from remote communes to modern cities as the process of urbanization.This has caused remarkable numbers of problems which government should involve in to solve.

2/Main Body 1:
-Briefly explain why people want to live in a big city.
for instant, I would write: People coming from rural area want to have a higher standard of living which includes more advanced healthcare system and technology, better education, higher income, more comfortable life.
-This trend of population movement has been creating several problems (like your mentioned pointed)


3/Main Body 2:
To settle down all of listed difficulties rising from urbanization, government should encourage the local people to stay at their homeland by improve the local standard of living by investment more in healthcare system and technology, establishing more pretigious shools, creating more jobs for local people.

4.Comclusion:

Exsiting along with undeniable benefits of urbannization, there are several of its drawbacks that the authorities should take proper actions to tackle.

I wonder if I can split my 1st body para into 2 paragraphs: 1 for why people move to city, 1 for drawbacks of such movement.

Is it suitable to write such a 1st body para?

Best regards,

Kim


Hi Kim,

This looks good. You don't need to split the first main body paragraph - most of it should be about the problems of city life, so don't waste too much time/space explaining why people come to cities.

thank u Simon

YOU R WONDERFUL MAN

Thanks!

simon thanks, you are so simple as well as wonderful

Hi simon:
I am Simi from Bangladesh. I have recently found your site and accessed about one week. It is really helpful. My IELTS exam on 11th june, 2011.
I am trying to follow ur writing style..I didn't get enough time to practise.....so don't understand my condition.....

Inroduction:

Nowadays,it is obvious that people shifting from rural areas to cities for expecting/ leading /living a better life is on increase. In spite of containing some extra facilities city life has its drawbacks which is increasing day by day for overcrowded people and government should be taken effective measures to tackle the cities problem as well as encourages them to live in rural areas with ensuring the better standard of living.

I think my writing style is more simple to achieve a high score. I use little bit complex sentence.
What is your suggestion about using complex sentences (which, where....)? Has it extra significance like using good phrases?

Many many thanks for your free site...
Simi

Oh I hink there is a mistake..."In spite of" will be replaced by "Despite of" containing some extra facilities, city life.....

Thanks
Simi

Hi Simi,

Don't worry about complex sentences. It's more important to focus on answering the question well, using good vocabulary and a clear essay structure. In terms of your grammar score, it's more important to avoid mistakes than to write long sentences.

Try to write slightly shorter introductions following my approach. The main body paragraphs are more important.

Hi,
I have tried writing on this topic, kindly correct me.

INTRODUCTION-
In the era of globalization and expanding industrialization,migration from urban places to cities have become a necessity for many people.This expansion of urbanization is subsequently causing many problems to the people living in metropolitan cities.This essay would discuss some of these problems and give suggestions for improving this situation.


Firstly,as the population in big cities is increasing day-by-day, it is bringing along many problems. An illustration of this is expensive housing and rental property in urban areas. Many people and in particular, students share accommodation to save money, which in fact does not provide them enough space and room required for a healthy and peaceful lifestyle.
Moreover, traffic congestion in cities is an earnest issue which hampers everyone's daily life.Many people have to start travelling very early to avoid traffic congestion and those who are not habitual early wakers end up waiting for hours during peak traffic timings. Therefore, life in a city on one hand is very luxurious and attractive but on the other hand,to gain these convenient life style people usually pays very high price.

To overcome the increasing troublesome life in cities, government should start some active measures.The authority should make stricter laws to reduce traffic such as,allowing ownership of only car per family and increasing prices of car and petrol.Similarly, promoting tax free public transport to promote more people to reduce the usage of personal vehicles. In addition to that, limit the constructions of apartments and dwellings in overcrowded areas. Finally,initiatives should be taken to reduce the influx of rural population to cities by promoting good services and secure jobs, as well as building high schools and hospitals in rural areas.


Conclusion:

In brief, expanding urbanization is causing many problems. Therefore, government should take initiatives to reduce influx of rural people to metropolitan cities, also they should improve the infrastructure of big cities to make it a better and cleaner place to live. Then only we would imagine a green and peaceful World with the mixed essence of urban and rural culture.

Hi Anisha,

I'm afraid I don't offer essay correction or scoring. If I did this, everyone would send me there essays.

However, you seem to have the right idea.


Hi Simon,

Some viewpoints above are likely to be similar, such as 'The cost of living is higher than in rural areas.' and 'Housing is usually much more expensive.' So if I use this point of view, 'the living cost is higher than in rural areas' could be my one argument and I should take 'the expensive housing in downtown' as a supportive example. So are the 'Cities lack a sense of community.' and 'People do not even know their neighbours.'. Is my idea ok?

Hi Lei,

Yes, your idea is fine.


is this a right introduction, sir?

It is certainly true that more people are attracted towards cities in order to have better lifestyles. however, this trend has resulted much problem.There are a number of reasons why life is challenging, and to make sure that people have better lifestyles,certain effective measures could be taken into an account.

You've got the right idea Simran.

This migration trend seems to pose more risks than benefits to urban districts. For instance, one of the major problem brought about by the exodus of rural workers is unemployment. Rural migrants flock to the business centers to find more stable jobs but, as the population in the cities increases, opportunities for employment become less likely.

Congestion is another significant problem. The increase in urban population has given rise to such issues as housing shortages, pollution, inadequacy of public transport and traffic problems. Worst of all, in an attempt to survive in an extremely hostile environment, some people even resort to crime.

In like manner, this craze for urban settlement is disadvantageous to the agricultural districts. As more people move to the cities in search of better jobs, fewer workers are left in the farmlands. This phenomenon cripples the productivity of the agricultural centers thus, affecting the quality of products that are sent to the urban places.

Nevertheless, it is not to late to curb this migration trend. The government, for instance, can help by increasing the salaries of agricultural workers and providing better equipment to lighten their work in the fields. This way, rural dwellers would find more motivation in staying in their hometowns.

The educational sector can also contribute in resolving this predicament by making agriculture more efficient and ensuring that agricultural workers have technological expertise.

Moreover, the business sector may establish industries and enterprises in rural areas and the suburbs to minimize the number of people migrating to the cities to search for jobs.

These combined measures can make both agricultural areas and urban centers better places to live in. This surely an outcome any nation would desire.

Hi Simon,
some viewpoints:
On one hand living in urban areas can be very difficult. Due to increased influx of people from countryside, the competition in urban areas can be extremely intense. Unless people obtain a very high skil, they are at a higher risk of unemployment comparing to in rural areas, which is usually called the dark side of the metropolitan areas. In addition, despite of developed health facilities, people hardly spend time on exercise and they are tend to eat more fast food due to quick pace of life in cities. So it dose not necessarily turn out to be good result to move into cities.

Living in a big city seems as an important type of improving outlook,looking for a job,gather among public places in order to find close friends,furthermore, it raise some essential problems nowadays such as traffic jam, quarrels and etc.

how is my introduction??

It is certainly true that people in rural areas migrating towards urban areas to achieve high standards of living, but indeed life in cities are more challenging and difficult when compared to villages.
There are many drawbacks of moving to more crowded areas for instance ,the cost of living is much higher in cities than rural areas, there are more serious problems like traffic congestion and high crime rate.Moreover, there is a lack of sense of community in big cities, people don't know anything about 5heir neighbours.Furthermore, inindividuals living in cities don't even have time for themselves and their families, as a result the gap between family members is on the increase.
As regard the solutions, individuals should consider the pros and cons of living in big cities, and also government should make every effort to bring awareness amonge people about problems of city life and must ensure to consider the reasons why people of less developed areas are migrating to cities .For instance, by providing good education, medical facilities, transportation and more importantly job prospects.
To conclude, if above mentioned solutions will be considered and implemented by government, the problems of overcrowding in big cities will be resolved, and the lives of people whether in urban and rural areas will be improved.

Simon I have your ebook, its realky amazing and helpful.

Could anyone please comment on my essay?


Now a days, a common trend of migrating to cites for better future prospects is commonly seen, however urban life can be full of challenges and surprises for young generation. In this essay we will analyse various issues young force faces while migrating and also what steps and measures government can take to resolve this issue.

this is Intro please do feel free to give suggestion

Hi simon...
my points are as under:
1.shortage of housing in big cities.
2.traffic, employment arious problem may be emerged.
3.due to heavy migrates,it might be slum and backward area rise.
4.people loose their traditions in cities
5. cost of living may be higher then rural or suburban area.
6.Due to increase in population, it will led a concrete jungle.
7.It will damage to environment also...

overcome points are as under..
1.government should encourage to people for living in suburban area.

2.Government should establish towns, at some distance in all over country...so people spread in that, so it will reduce baurdan of big cities.

3.Government should create all necessary facilities, business and employment in town for people.

Hi simon,
Please check my introduction of essay people migrating from rural areas to urban areas. What are causes, effect and remedies.
Introduction :due to technological development, it is now easy to move from one place to another within small passage of time.migration from rural to cities cause problems. I will discuss it's causes , effect in next passage.
Please reply to me.

Hi simon is it good that using 7,8 academic and formal words in introduction or the words of related theme would be better?

. government should improve the public traffic system and change lower traffic fee, use these strategies to encourage people to live in the suburban area
. government should control the price of things in city strictly, from state to vegetable, to make everyone in the city can offered the his or her spend.
. the council need try to make job opportunities to make sure everyone in the city can find a job .

hi simon
my ideas are
1. employment problem is the biggest problem and gov.should take proper steps against it.
2.govt should make some good educational institution like cities
3.some good healthcare institution should be in the villages

Hello simon. My name is Ismayil. I want to my writing is better but my writing low 3.0-3.5. How can I increase my writing level?
Dear Ismayil

Life in many cities around the world is becoming so expensive that one day only rich people will be able to live there. What are there causes of this situation? What measures could be taken to solve this problem?

Sir tell me about this eassy answer

Hi simon
DoI need to say something abt the first sentence the question while im answering...plz reply

People migrate to urban cities from their local area rapidly growing of industrialisation and globalisation.i would like to discuss cities problem which is rising day by day.
Firstly,in urban areas houses,flats,buildings are very expensive as well as rent is so high which people can afford to pay that amount.because in every cities different classes of people living here according to their financial income.the material what we purchase is so high.and the next problem is that natural greenery for getting oxygen is also not available because its scale fall down everyday.And the last one but not least pollution plays a significant role in our life.whenever people go to their office they have to face traffic problems regularly. Their time approximately two hours waste.
Moreover if i discss about the example,recently Delhi people have to sufferfrom the smog for six to ten days.
In the long run away,govt.should take steps for reducing traffic problems as well as planting more trees.

It might be there are many reasons behind imgrating to the cities rather than health care , eduction , high wages. I think cities are more attractive especially for young people and there are many things need to be discovered. people used to be lived in rural areas since along time and usually life is ordinary there , nothing is new or modern viceversa cities are developed every hours in different fields. people these days are following their passions and that not available in the countryside. The world now is becoming more sociable and connected each others from remote places to close district and that make people cons and pros of living weather in cities or the country.however, cities seem more comfortable , sociable , powerful , modern and fast. in cities , we can make more friends ,enrol in a good unviersities and meet with smart people , in addition to , cities provide people with all means such as transpotation , health care , diversity of business.

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