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Sunday, May 13, 2018

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QUESTION : Everyone should stay in school until the age of eighteen. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

I do not agree that staying in school till the age of eighteen is productive for everyone. The extended time in school does not guarantee that the students will be more competitive and skillful in their professional life. To learn practical skills, students must explore and engage in the real world situations, and this is a better way for them to enhance their learning.


THANK YOU

and so therefore, writing and thinking are not different, they both are linked,right? Thank you very much for today.

Can someone help me to correct my essay?
Here it is. I would be appreciated.


WR2: Museums and art galleries should more concentrate on the local work and art related to culture and history of their countries rather than showing the art from other countries. Do u agree or disagree with this?


It is true that some museum and art galleries focus on more art pieces from all around the world, and others just try to support only local artists. I believe that local artists need support but the initial approach should be kept the diversity of art at the galleries and museums.

Museums and art galleries play an important role in teaching people about history, culture, art and many other aspects of life. We had learned our own national history and culture throughout our school year, but we have little known about other countries culture and backgrounds. If museums only put an emphasis on local artist, it would be unfair to the audience that wants learn more about other cultures. Some people don't have enough money to travel all around the world, museums would be a great substitute for exploring other nations.


Also, it is important to support our own local artist. They should be promoted properly for the well-known of own culture and history. By doing this their fame would be expanded abroad and reach the other countries museums and art galleries. If galleries just focused on popular foreign artists to get more money from visitor and were reluctant to display their art from own culture, would be a shame. Moreover, the main creation of art is connected and reunited people together, separating art by nationality is against the main purpose of art.

In conclusion, I believe that other countries art is important as much as local art. There should be equality between them.

@BUG

"and others just try to support only local artists." Either "just" or "only" but not both together like this.

"the initial approach should be kept to keep the diversity "

"we have little known " -> we know little about ....

"If museums only put an emphasis on local artists," : the easiest way to generalize about countable nouns is to use the plural.

"unfair to the audience" -> unfair to/on visitors who wish/are seeking to learn ....
("wish" is often used instead of "want" in more formal writing)

https://www.google.com/search?q=%22unfair+on%22&lr=lang_en&tbs=lr:lang_1en&tbm=bks&ei=hWX4WtmsC8O70gSY67X4BA&start=10&sa=N&biw=1222&bih=958&dpr=1

"don't": avoid short forms in formal and business writing -> do not

"Some people don't have ..world, museums would be a .. " : this is two sentences joined by a comma, which is not possible in English. Either separate with full stop/period, or a colon/semi-colon, or use a conjunction like "and". Google "run-on" or "comma splice" sentence.

"support our own local artist." Which one are you referring to? Or did you mean to generalize?

"for the well-known of own culture and history." ?? Meaning unclear. -> for being well-known locally? for being well-known in our own culture/history?

Usual verb with fame is "spread":

https://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=fame+*_VERB&year_start=1900&year_end=2000&corpus=15&smoothing=3&share=&direct_url=t2%3B%2Cfame%20%2A_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%2Cs0%3B%3Bfame%20was_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bfame%20is_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bfame%20had_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bfame%20has_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bfame%20rests_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bfame%20spread_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bfame%20will_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bfame%20would_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bfame%20are_VERB%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bfame%20were_VERB%3B%2Cc0

the other countries museums -> museums and art galleries in other countries

from visitor -> from visitors (meaning visitors in general: singular countable nouns normally have an article or similar)

their art from own culture -> art from their own culture: "art" here is uncountable so no article

-> it would be a shame. Usually: It would be a shame if ....

the main creation of art is connected and reunited people -> the main purpose of art is to connect and reunite people OR art serves to connect ...

other countries art is important as much as local art -> art from other countries is just as important as local art.

Also, it is important to support -> It is also important to .... Tucking the adverb into the middle of the sentence avoids starting each sentence with a linking adverb.

In general, make sure that the use of articles is correct where generalizing.

RE USE OF ARTICLES AND GENERALIZING:

http://ielts-simon.com/ielts-help-and-english-pr/2016/07/ielts-grammar-articles.html

http://ielts-simon.com/ielts-help-and-english-pr/2017/08/ielts-grammar-uncountable-nouns.html

http://ielts-simon.com/ielts-help-and-english-pr/2012/11/ielts-writing-task-1-articles.html

EXAMPLES FROM COMMENTS:

"We mean "parental pressure" in general here, so no article, uncountable."

"Again, it is usually safer to use the plural with no article when generalizing a countable noun."

"about situation": "situation" is countable here and needs an article.

"Great art piece": singular and countable, so needs an article.

"community service" is usually uncountable:

https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/community_service

https://books.google.com/ngrams/graph?content=a+community+service+*%2Ccommunity+service%2Ca+community+service%2C+community+service+*&year_start=1960&year_end=2008&corpus=15&smoothing=3&share=&direct_url=t2%3B%2Ca%20community%20service%20%2A%3B%2Cc0%3B%2Cs0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20order%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20project%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20organization%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20program%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20agency%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20and%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20center%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20to%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20for%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Ba%20community%20service%20group%3B%2Cc0%3B.t1%3B%2Ccommunity%20service%3B%2Cc0%3B.t1%3B%2Ca%20community%20service%3B%2Cc0%3B.t2%3B%2Ccommunity%20service%20%2A%3B%2Cc0%3B%2Cs0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20and%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20organizations%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20projects%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20programs%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20activities%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20in%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20order%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20agencies%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20is%3B%2Cc0%3B%3Bcommunity%20service%20work%3B%2Cc0

Rarely is it counted:

"provide a community service"

"A hospital is, after all, a community service.."

French, Spanish, Catalan, Portuguese often use definite article when generalizing:

Il déteste le café.
He hates coffee.

La vie est compliquée.
Life is complicated.

La vie est compliquée.
Life is complicated.

J'adore les concombres!
I love cucumbers!

Notice that in English it is often omitted (although it is sometimes possible in academic writing). This would apply in over a dozen places in your essay.

@Sunita

Thank you, Sunita. I am checking everything you write me. Misuse of articles appears on my essays often. I just realize that. I am on my mission to correct them.

Hi,
Have a great day everyone. Here I am with my new essay. Hope somebody can help me about correcting it.


Some say using a car for travel in cities are the best. however other believe that bicycles are better. 
Discuss both sides and Give your opinion.

It is true that traveling with a car in cities is reasonable transportation considering time and distance. While some people prefer bicycles for saving environment reasons strictly, and I believe that, by the help of new technology, electric cars are the best option to move around at the cities.

On the one hand bicycles seems the best option when it comes to saving environment. It doesn't consume any gas like standard cars. It requires small parking space. It also causes no traffic problem which is one of the biggest problems of cities. However many cities had made up by ups and downs in the landscape. For Example, using a bicycle all day long in Istanbul can be challenging and tiring, but I know that many commuter use bicycles in Europe and I see it is a positive trend. It is advantageous for well-being, physical health too.

On the other hand, cars can be beneficial for when we are in a hurry, and we need to move one place to another one quickly which we can not escape from this truth in city life. Although cars have its drawbacks when it comes to using them daily, we have lots of option at the market thanks to technology. Electric cars are the most effective way concerning saving the environment from disruption. We should be preserved our environment by using hybrid electric vehicles. They are also cheaper to run and easy to maintain in city life.

In conclusion, I think that electric cars are most effective and eco-friendly way to get around in the cities.

I just realize, I still have some misuse of articles going on. Too bad.

Most students are eager to get the desired score in a short time and sometimes teachers fail to persuade students to take their time and make their efforts. To make the teaching-learning process easier, some teachers give students rigid templates, require students to memorize any-essay phrases and sentence patterns. Students find this approach effortless and feel like it. Predictably, these students seldom get the scores they need and they have to spend more time and energy and money on IELTS and some even get quite frustrated and just give up their dreams.

Teachers need help students to build a healthier mindset.

Hi Simon.

You made an excellent point. It is true that I do not discuss any IELTS topics with my family, colleagues or friends. As a result of the daily life conversations, I do not have any right idea to complete IELTS writing task2 and Speaking task3. My ex-teacher reminded me the point, and I force myself to speak some topics where I do not have enough vocabulary. I hope my mindset gradually get better, and think clearly to achieve my aiming score.

Hi Simon, I have practiced with your materials on the website and I was confident on my exam day especially in writing. However, I got 5.5 and I do not know why. I have written in clear paragraphs with structured sentences. How can I improve to band 7 or at least up to 6.5 when I’m 5.5? I’m so stressed and worried :( ...... many thanks, Soo

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