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Wednesday, January 30, 2013

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Hi Simon
Thank you so much for your work, it is so helpful for many of us. I have a question with a title "Traffic congestion is becoming a huge problem for many major cities. Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce traffic in big cities". So for type of question, i should only write about solutions or it is also a problem/solution question and i will structure my essay as yours( first body paragraph is problem, second is solution)?

Hi Simon and everyone. Here is my essay for the question above. Every comment is a precious advice for me
Traffic congestion is becoming a huge problem for many major cities. Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce traffic in big cities.
It is true that traffic jam is growing issue for many big cities. There are undoubtedly some negative consequences, we can take steps to mitigate these impacts of this problem.
One of the effective measures to deal with the traffic problem is upgrading transport infrastructure. The fact that the wider streets and bridges are, the easier means of transports can move. In other words, space of traffic is larger and therefore vehicles can flow more convenient and there is bigger number of means can be on road. To have modern infrastructure, government should increase spending more on facilities or encourage private enterprises invest in this sector and allow them to charge fee on people when they drive on roads, bridges or underground tunnels built from companies’ budgets.
There is an alternative method as reduce the number of citizens in large cities. When there are fewer people in the urban areas, it means that there is smaller number of vehicles running on the roads. To reach this target, authorities could develop rural areas, relocate the universities, hospital and trade center far from cities. Governments also formulate policies to cut the populations of these cities by restriction of immigration from rural areas. For instance, if a person wants to settle in urban areas, they need to have a steady job for a companies based on cities in time at least 2 years.
Traffic congestion is pressing problem for lots of cities but there are various measure to tackle or mitigate the effects of this issue.
(253 words)

Hi Simon,

I really do appreciate all your works have done here. The interesting thing is that I always have seen the simplicity and clarity within your essays. You've really adhered to your principle during running your site, unlike other sites, even those who are native and want to write beyond Band 9, you come with simplicity to show where is Band 9, not write in that way that makes candidates bitterly disappointed to achieve higher scores.
However, when I take a glimps of your essay saw it begins with" it is" ?? As some writes hold the opinion that DO NOT BEGIN with " it is"?? please let me know whether I made a mistake. The second thing I want to ask you put more task2 essays as homework , for example once a week. Thank you for your efforts.

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations?

Technology In today’s life is unlikely to be denied in its invaluable resource at nearly most sectors in our life time especially health and care provisions. This unprecedented influence shows a clear increase in people’s overall life expectancy in developed countries list. Reasonable and prudent measures are obliged to tackle this phenomenon.
One of the most significant problems facing local authorities in advanced countries is how to fund these pensioners in terms of caring , health and accommodation services. That means a basic rate taxpayer has to feed the required allocated substantial budget that financing ageing people services. For example, the UK authorities provide almost a comprehensive support to pensioners for more than two decades after being retired. Being victims of fraud and car accidents is another issue; they are vulnerable ad suffering from a wide range of elderly chronic diseases such dementia and insomnia .
Financial issue could be tackled by imposing an extra money support to the anticipated budget for these elders . For example, There are schemes of charities work together to raise some money to fund these budgets, this could be done by selling their houses if they are having one. Most pensioners’ houses are no longer needed because they inclined to spend the rest of their life at care homes. Thus , this money may give a minor relief to tax payer’s citizens. Post caution road signs are required in the areas where these pensioners live in order to mitigate the unanticipated incidents.
To conclude, It is absolutely essential to take a part in this society to help the local authorities to backing their ideologies in this matter fiscally, emotionally and managerially. This will help in improving the image of their countries.

Hi
May someone wrires an essay about this?

As children become adults, their social behavior changes in some ways.
What are the main differences between young chikdren's social behavior and that of adults? To what extent are the changes that take place good?

I really enjoyed reading your essay. Thanks.

How are we supposed to check the word count on the test's day, without a computer? just by guessing?

Hi,

Again, I really thank you for the model answer you've provided in here. You never fail to help me and as well as those IELTS examinees that uses your model essays for their upcoming exams. TheIELTSSolution.com

Thank you.

Hi Simon. I saw your website so informative and practical. Thank you for your endless support. I appreciate that.

Here is my IELTS assignment for this topic. I hope my essay can help others.

Nowadays, as a result of an increase in the life expectancy, an ever-increasing number of industrialized countries are facing aging populations. Obviously, these communities are grappling with a multitude of problems. However, there are various ways to tackle these problems.
It goes without saying that an aging population causes grave problems for both individuals and societies all of which should be taken into account. One of the underlying issues each industrialized nation encounters is that the community will lose its skilled, gifted, and qualified workers, once relied on for their proficiency and skills. Moreover, elderly people need more health care, because they are more prone to get diverse diseases. Therefore, the government should allocate a large proportion of its budget not only for improving health care centers, but also for constructing nursing homes, as well as amenities to enhance the well-being and welfare of its senior citizens. Another problem is that the government need to pay pensions to retired people who live in the society.
There is not a shadow of a doubt that there are numerous ways to address these problems. As a first step, just as contraception methods should be discouraged, the government should also encourage couples to have more children by incentive factors, such as increasing the length of maternity leave and providing follow-up medical care for newborns, as well as for their mothers during pregnancy and after childbirth. Then, the community should increase the number of immigrants by designating some special rights to them, such as the right to work, and right of citizenship.
To conclude, it is clear that more and more developed countries are facing aging populations, which may cause countless problems. Nevertheless, there are varied ways to address this problem.

nice essay sarah!

thanks for sharing :)

FROM SIMON:

I'm afraid I no longer have time to answer everyone's questions individually. However, I do still read them all, and I try to answer some questions in a lesson once a week.

You are very welcome, Princess K. :)

sarah,i can see that you have a g0od c0mmand in english,is it okay for you to check my essays? :)

to all! kindly check my essay and give feedback. thanks.

NOWADAYS, PEOPLE CAN WORK AND STUDY AT HOME THROUGH THE INTERNET. HOWEVER, THE EFFECTS OF LONG-DISTANCE PROGRAMS CAN NEVER BE AS GOOD AS FACE TO FACE PROGRAMS. DISCUSS BOTH SIDES AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.

With the advent of technology today new forms of educational set-ups are conceived. One product of this is people can now study on-line. I believe that this type of program cannot beat the benefits of the conventional learning procedure where in there is personal interaction of teacher and student.

We cannot deny the convenience of Internet study especially to people who are busy with their jobs and other responsibilities. This one way of obtaining diploma and certificate can be very helpful to some because they may not resign or take a lengthy leave from work and thus prevent themselves from generating income just to finish schooling. It is also practical in such a way that students will not tire themselves by going to and fro the school.

However, the aforementioned advantages of this type of distance learning are outweighed by the gain from personal academic settings. In this old style of acquiring knowledge, students can inquire to their teachers right away whenever they have questions or they can be clarified at once to subject matters vague to them. This means of education also demands concentration while the professor is lecturing and so it fosters better information absorption and digestion in the part of the learner. Lastly, there are bonus profits from the relational bonding formed in a classroom environment where in growth and learning about life is fostered through it.

In conclusion, even if getting a diploma through Internet sheds some handiness, the great impact of the physical classroom structure is matchless.

Hi Nj,
I tried to make an essay with the theme you mentioned above. I've just started to study for IELTS and this is my third essay.I am aware of the problems of this essay such as repeted words and spelling,but I do think I will get better within some time.So here we go!

As Children become adults,their social behavior changes in some ways.What are the main differences between young children's social behavior and that of adults?To what extent are the changes that take place good?

It is a fact that throughout our life many changes will place.This changing process is not only biological,but also psychological. As a result,our social behavior is also affected.Generally,we tend to learn how to deal effectively with all demands imposed by our modern society,but at the same time,we become more selfish and judgemental.

As a child,our first social experience is at home within our own family.The authority of our parents show us since the beginning that there are rules to be followed.We learn how to get adjusted to those rules,which will be of paramount importance for our future life in society.Children naturally tend to be friendly and approachable,but it can expose them to the risk of suffering sexual abuse.As a consequence,parents restrict their child freedom in an attempt to protect them,but it can cause serious problems in the future such as difficulties in relationships and excessive introspection.However, not everything is good about children.They sometimes can be very cruel and sarcastic,given all problems faced by many of them because of the bullying which is so popular in schools nowadays.

On the other hand,adults tend to be less approachable.Their circle of friends is,most part of the cases,just a fraction of what it used to be on their childhood.The world is always seen by them from a fragmented perspective,therefore, this makes prejudice a noticeable characteristics among most of them.One of the good things of our adulthood is the fact that we reach a level of maturity that allow us to make choices for ourselves and overcome the great diversity of challenges we will face in life.Another interesting aspect is the fact that many of us is engaged in some kind of social work.We are aware of the problems faced by our society and recent researches have demonstrated that we are trying to give our contribution for a better world.

In conclusion,our behavior will always be in accordance with the moment we are living at a certain point.It is a pity that many of our qualities as a child are not carried with us in our journey through the life.I do believe that the changes we experience in our social behavior are vital for our survival in the modern,wild societies we live in.

Juliane Mota,from Brazil


Hi all

This is my answer to the above essay. Look forward to get any replies or corrections. All of them will be precise.

It is clear that with the progress of technology of modern civilization, human beings can live for a longer time. However, there will be some forthcoming problems caused by the explosive increase of the elderly people. Therefore, people have to figure out some measures to overcome these problems.

With the dramatic increase in the elderly population in the near future, there will be some problems accompanied by. First of all, too much old people lead to an unbalanced workforce ratio. As a result, there are fewer people can work for companies so it may cause to an economic recession. Furthermore, more elderly people imply it will be a tougher time for young people to raise them. Secondly, the governments are likely to pay the lion’s share of budget to take care of the old people. For example, it is predicted that more and more elderly people will be involved in the health care system, which will be a huge financial burden.

In spite of these serious problems, the governments could introduce some policies to work it out. Look into the work problems, foreign worker could be imported to fill possible vacancies or the governments could encourage people to produce more babies to add more young workers. Perhaps, the working age could be extended to make old people keep working. Therefore, the societies can work as normal. As for the medical problem, the governments should build up a fair health system to ensure the system will not work in deficit and also help people a lot. Moreover, the experts also should be encouraged to strengthen medical knowledge to help people keep away from diseases.

All in all, despite the fact that there are many upcoming problems caused by the aging population, if we can introduce some right measures to deal with them, everything will be hunky-dory.

Hi Sarah,

You did write a very good essay. In terms of TASK RESPONSE sufficiently addressed all parts of the task. And also you used a wide range of lexical vocab. The majority of sentences are error-free and accuracy is seen in your sentences, and also logically you organised information and ideas;


However, there are things I'd like to point out. How long did it take you to write this essay? 287 a little bit long I think you could cut them those long sentences down. And increase your readability.

For example:It goes without saying that an aging population causes grave problems for both individuals and societies all of which should be taken into account==>It goes without saying that an aging population causes grave problem with both individuals and societies

Do not overuse of cohesive devices, and it would be better they not come consecutively. (in paragraph one: moreover,therefor) use pronouns as Simon does to make his essay smooth.

And I think also it’s better do not use more than once Generic sentences like: “It goes without saying that”, “There is not a shadow of a doubt” in one essay.
And some slips such as:
Verb-subject agreement: the government need to pay pensions==> The government needs to

Article: right of citizenship.==> the right of citizenship

Adjective and nouns:
Contraception methods==> contraceptive methods or methods of contraception or birth control methods

Word choice:
As a first step, just as contraception methods should be discouraged, the government should also encourage couples==>
As a first step, while contraceptive methods should be discouraged, ….
AND
designating some special rights to them==> establishing or giving some special rights

Repetition: using “ Problem” consecutively – other choice would be “ issue”


All in all, this is a very good essay, and you can make very error-free sentences. Thanks for sharing this .

hi salamat! can you please check mine too?

thank you! :)

Increase of average life expectancy is now obvious in developed countries.but to sustain a health society with growing number of elderly people some reforms have to be made.

on one hand, due to advanced medical health care a lot of ailments related with aging can be prevented and managed giving the elderly a better quality of life,and allowing people to spend more time with their loved ones.

on the other hand increase in the number of elderly people demands for more money and time for their care.the government has to pay pension to more retired people,the children have to spend more time taking care of their parents, and because in developed countries the trend is to have less or no children , the number of financially dependent population will increase, as compared to the younger earning population.

some reforms should be taken such as more government funding in medical care and nursing for the elderly,government should encourage people to have more kids so that the earning population increases and more children can share their parents responsibilities without feeling burdened, foreign immigration should be encourages to support the general economy .

in conclusion various strategies should be planned and executed to ensure that the requirements of the aging population are met without causing social or economic problems.

Sarah,
It seems to me that you must be a native english speaker?! the way you have organized your sentences, your vocabulary band and also the smoothnes that can be felt by reading your essay and powerful communication, all sway me to feel so.
I enjoyed your essay very much and I hope I could be able to write such a one!
my IELTS exam is on 23rd of Feburary ( not much left!!) and I'm trying to do my best.
please write more!

Hi all,
Please review my essay regarding ageing populations below. Hope that I will receive your invaluable feedbacks and also help some others.
Topic
In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

Answer:
In recent years, the average life expectancy in the developed countries is increasing because of the technological advances as well as the advent of high-quality healthcare services. Some people may argue that this would result in various issues for individuals and communities; therefore, some precaution measures should be applied to alleviate the adverse influences of ageing populations.

In this essay, I will discuss some negative aspects of the increased average life expectancy and propose some measures mitigating its impacts on our society.

Undoubtedly, today’s inhabitants are living in a world where the technological and scientific advances are omnipresent; for example, they present in ways that people are using to communicate with each other and cope with health-related problems. Notoriously, people have devised various kinds of vaccines enhancing the immune system; as a result, today’s people could get rid of many types of dangerous diseases as well as increase the average life expectancy. Moreover, today’s elderly could enjoy better healthcare services than ever; therefore, they would be able to reach higher age thresholds, such as 75 and 80.

However, an ageing population would probably put an immense burden on our society. Obviously, a part of the younger age group would have to work hard to accommodate the needs of the whole society and offset the lack of workforce. A country, which has an ageing population, would certainly face a lot of difficulties in the labor-intensive fields, such as ship building industry, mineral exploration and car manufacture. An ageing population would also require a vast amount of the workforce participating in nursing homes; in turn, this would compound the imbalanced labor distribution over productive and unproductive activities.

In my opinion, some measures should be taken to mitigate the impacts of ageing populations. Firstly, governments should apply some social policies to increase birth rates. Obviously, high birth rates would gradually make up for the lack of workforce; nonetheless, high birth rates would expose our society to other serious issues. In fact, it is very likely that overpopulation would put an intense strain on transport infrastructure as well as aggravate the food crisis around the globe. In addition to increasing birth rates, governments must invest more money in scientific research and applications of the cutting-edge technologies in taking care of the elderly. Actually, this could be one of the most efficient methods to shift a huge amount of the workforce towards productive activities.

In conclusion, besides efforts in order to improve the quality of life and increase average life expectancy, governments must also keep seeking for solutions to problems resulted by ageing populations, and make sure that old people are in good care.

This essay answer is great. I am looking forward to see more examples from you.

Hi every body. I would be grateful if any body could check over my essay and inform me with my mistakes:
Despite all the government’s efforts to decrease the number of car
accidents, this number is still on the rise.
In your opinion, how can the government help reduce the number of car
accidents?
Use specific reasons to support your opinion.

The rise in the number of car accidents has been almost the main issue of modern, industrialised countries. Although several actions have been taken to mitigate this problem, I believe that there are still some effective measures that could be taken to improve the situation.

In my opinion, a simple solution that could be put forward to reduce accident rates is introducing strict rules for drivers. For example, the figure for permitted speed in various roads and streets of a particular city or town should be decreased to a lower rate in relation to the population of that region and its traffic congestion. Therefore, drivers will have to drive slower and more careful in order to obey the rule, otherwise they will have to pay a great deal of fine for breaking the law. In this way, high speed which is always to blame the main factor of most serious accidents will be taken away from account.

Further measure would be to widen more of the streets and highways of different zones in order to facilitate transmissions and speed conveying services. Moreover, separating motor vehicles and allocating especial roads and paths to bicycles and motorcycles would be another preventative solution that ensures safer transports between different areas. All in all, people should be aware more of the potential dangers of breaking the law and its critical consequences. In fact, they should be encouraged to adopt lawful actions.

In conclusion, I would argue that various actions could be taken to tackle several car accidents that are certain to arise throughout the country.

Hi Asal,

You attempted to answer all questions, but some reasons did not well elaborated in the first paragraph. And also there are mistakes in terms of word choices. Unfortunately this site does not offer good toolbar to edit your essay.
essayskills@gmail.com

Hi Salamat,
I have emailed attached of the above essay. I really appreciate your comments and notes.
Thanks a lot

It is true that at present life expectancy is increasing more than ever before. Although there are some detrimental effects of this phenomenon, governments can mitigate these potential problems.
As people live longer and the populations start to age, several consequent problems can be expected. On the one hand there are many people of retirement age; as a result more money should be allocated from the overall budget for their pensions. Moreover, governments need to spend more money on healthcare, because generally old people are prone to various diseases. A further problem is that at present there are many who prefer to have fewer children, and as a consequence in the future people will face such problems as decreasing levels of productivity as the workforce shrinks. Due to that fact the proportion of young working adults might decrease, government in turn will receive less tax money, which can lead to a greater tax burden for younger generations.
There are a number of suggestions to solve such difficulties. First and foremost, governments could encourage couples to have more children through welfare benefits and the provision of housing along with a sufficient level of healthcare for newborn children and mothers. Furthermore, governments could increase the number of immigrants by giving them better opportunities to receive citizenship and find unemployment. Finally, another way forward might be an increase in the retirement age for working adults, owing to the fact that currently older people live longer and, therefore, are able to work at an older age.
In conclusion, even though modern society will inevitably face problems with ageing populations, some effective measures might be implemented provided that governments take the leading role and act immediately.

Thanks Simon,your essays are very helpful.I am thinking to take my exam next month

Hi Guys,

I haven't visited this website for a month. I am SO glad to hear that I could help you. Actually, I'm not a native speaker of English but I hope I can do my best in the IELTS test. :)

Thanks Salamat for correcting my essay. I really appreciate it. ^_^

Dear all,
I really appreciate your comments and notes. I would be grateful if any body could check over my essay and inform me with my mistakes:
"Studying the English language in an English-speaking country is the best but not the only way to learn language.
Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
You should write at least 250 words.
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task"


It can not be denied that studying English as the second language is an enduring and exhausting process. English learners have to try their best to approach and find own their effective ways of learning. It is widely agreed that an English-speaking country is the most ideal environment to make language acquisition. However, it is not the sole path to perfect the language.
First of all, studying English at countries where English is the primary language usually brings many academic benefits for learners. Actually, English learners can easily get the opportunity to practice four basic skills with native speakers all day long and it has also an opportunity to practise it with the right pronunciation, voice, speed, intonation and ect.
The second reason of studying the English language in an English-speaking country will make english learners know much about the native culture, as well as the education here is update and progressive knowledge. Language is the origin of real life. Each language has own special features and regulations in forming and developing the variety of language streamline. As a result, English learners use english more effectively in the both normal life and specialized work.
The last reason that studying the English language in an English-speaking country is the best but not the only way to learn language is that there are opportunities to practise listening to and speaking with native foreigners through the Internet. Internet nowadays is really a magical and useful tool to let students interact with native speakers as if students are being beside. Students can find send their homeworks via email, make a face-to-face conversation via skype,…. Surely they can learn English well in any countries if enough motivative and patient.
In conclusion, it is a good idea to study English in an English-speaking country. However, I believe that there are many other effective strategies for learning English which are useful enough.


Once again, I really appreciate your comments and notes.


Hi,,, Please Can you help me writing about this easy :) some student in university feeling badly because they didn't have friendly . What the solution for this problem .???

I want this writing now because I have exams

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